There are lots of small snippets of things dashing around in my head. I don't know if I'll be able to string them together in a coherent way and I think I'm not going to try. I've slept terribly for the last two nights; I don't know why. Though I know that I am always dealing with the dread that comes alone with Pollyanna ReBot's visits.
I've realized that taking the literacy coach position was a huge mistake. My confidence in myself and my ability as a teacher took such a beating from the ReBots last year. All I got was criticism, you suck, you don't do this, etc. Then one of the Rebots wanted to know why I wasn't applying for a lead teacher position. And I suppose I am on the road to emotional recovery because that made me want to laugh. Of course I was thinking "Are you fucking kidding me?" but I explained that I just wanted to teach full time. I want nothing to do with Region people and their ideas. I can't say an extra $10k would not make a difference to my husband and I, but if I know my Region they'd bleed it out of me.
Today I actually began cleaning out my room. I'll be there again in the fall, and I have two closets that lock. One locked closet contains a class set of Elements of Literature: Intro and a class set of Elements of Literature: First Course. I have used both for mini lessons and shared readings, and if Polly knew I had them, she'd take them from me. She'd prefer that we make photocopies of stories.
If she even tries to come near those books I will kick her ass. In the meantime, I am stashing whatever I think I will need for seventh grade
Polly makes me feel like a moron. She does it by talking circles around me and making everything seem much more complicated than it is. Now, I don't think teaching is easy, but it's not nuclear physics. Unless, of course, you teach nuclear physics. Otherwise, welcome to the new wave in school
Ironically, I don't even mind the Workshop Model. I just can't deal with the there's-only-one-way-to-do-this-and-it's-MY-way crap. My principal wants us to become a part of that "Empowerment Zone" though he has some concerns about the teachers embracing the idea. But I told him that if it does truly empower us to teach our kids according to what we think they need, it'll be a no-brainer. I see so many creative people who are just being stifled to death.